Therapy for the fruit cake!

I mentioned in a previous post that I had been seeing a therapist/counsellor for my depression/anxiety which has been brought on from this pregnancy.

I hadn't even realised you could get antenatal depression! It was through doing the standard Google self diagnosis that I discovered there even was such a thing.  I had only heard of postnatal depression - this I understood as I had suffered from this after my first pregnancy, but the feeling of being on a constant low, feeling like a failure and generally worthless, was not something I was familiar with during pregnancy.

Around 10%of mums-to-be are affected - with women who have suffered from depression or anxiety previously at greater risk - and those figures could be set to rise if women aren't given the help and support they need to recognise and overcome the illness.

Farewell B2

OK, so I won't pretend that the lead up to this day has been a mixture of happiness and anxiety.  I didn't know what to expect!

I certainly didn't think it would be a full on busy day, still going on like I would be there again Monday morning all bright eyed and bushy tailed!  I was still sitting in the office waiting for my equally crazy friend to finish her reports before heading off for pizza down the road.

I've been struggling a lot during this pregnancy with what the doctors and midwife has called "prenatal depression" NOT JUST MY HORMONES PLAYING UP!!! Which is what I had initially put my moods and constant crying down to. This is one for another blog, I'll tell you all about it later!

Getting to 29th January 2016 has been a journey and a half to say the least.  

LEGO!!

I do not know whether to shake the man's hand or bury him in a rather deep grave! 

Today, melt down over the Lego house that my son built all because it fell apart! 

I struggle enough to get both my kids out of bed in the morning! 

This normally consists of the light going on at 7:15, knocking on the door and annoying singing "do you wanna build a snowman" which is usually followed by "leave me alone".  I then attempt to threaten them with cold water, at which point I turn the bathroom tap on so they think the threat is real and finally the window is opened, causing a cold draft!

Will I enjoy being a mum?

Currently 35 weeks pregnant and have 2 days left until I finish for the longest maternity I have taken - 9 whole months!

Am currently full of mixed emotions including anxiety, relief and excitement.  Mostly, I am worried that I won't like being a mum.  I then have to remind myself that it's too late to worry about that seen as I already have an almost 10 year old daughter and 4 year old son and so have been a mum for almost a decade.  So why now?  Why all of a sudden do I have this daunting feeling that I won't be any good at it?  I mean, I've managed to keep my daughter and son alive for the last 10 years, so what is worrying me?